Monday, November 21, 2016

My Kids Don't Believe in Santa

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I guess technically the title is only 2/3 true, two of my three children no longer believe in Santa.  I knew it would happen, I am often surprised it didn't happen sooner or I am beginning to realize, maybe it did.

I usually don't discuss or do Christmas before Thanksgiving, poor neglected Thanksgiving, but my mama heart is kind of in shock and mourning a bit.

Yesterday Alex and I were doing a puzzle, I love puzzles especially the Eric Dowdle puzzles, I have a closet full of them.   We picked out a Christmas one.  While we were doing the puzzle I began singing 'Grandma Got Ran Over by a Reindeer',  of all the Christmas songs I had to pick that one.   "Is that true?" Alex asked.

"No of course not, it's just a silly song." I replied.

Then it came, the dreaded question, the question most parents half hope will never be asked.

"Is Santa Real?"

All three of my kids were in the room, including my youngest only 6-years-old; I didn't want the magic to be ruined for him, not yet.  Just yesterday he believed his sister was really able to teleport things in a "machine" powered by him running around the house.   I wanted that innocence to remain just a little longer.

"What do you believe?" I replied, feeling a twinge of guilt.

"Santa is real." My 12-year-old interjected..... followed by a big wink towards his sister.

He knows, and now so does she.
Back when Santa came to Alex's preschool and she did believe 
I figured my 12-year-old must know, I figured he has probably known for a few years, but he has never asked.  My daughter was always the more suspicious one, asking a few times.  He never even once seemed to express any doubt, always playing along.  But he knows, and now my daughter knows for sure too.

Only my 6-year-old still fully believes.

This has been a transition year for me, my oldest starting middle school and leaving Primary and going into the teenage youth program at church, my youngest now being in school all day.  While I truly am happy with life right now, there are definitely little moments that make me mourn for some of the little moments of the past.

Now I am unsure what to do.  Do I take her aside and talk with her about it, talk with my oldest find out when he stopped believing?  Or do I just let it go, knowing they are allowing their brother to believe just a little longer.  I think my mama heart doesn't really want to know and accept that they no longer believe.

Can't I just live in denial?

Do your kids still believe?  When or how did you talk with them about it if they don't?


  1. We made the decision not to "do" Santa right from the beginning, in part to avoid feeling dishonest. Elise views him as a character, the same as Minnie Mouse or any Disney princess. She receives gifts from us, some wrapped, others displayed for her to see right away on Christmas morning.

    1. Yes, I have heard some people decide to do this.. now that some of the shock and realization has worn off, I am grateful for the time they did have to believe in the magic and that Ryder still does for a few more years. The older two are doing just fine with it all

  2. We never have said Santa isn't real. I don't think you ever have to say it. My older kids have figured it out. I'm not sure on my 10 year old. But it's one of those things we never "admit" and the older ones have played along as they figure it out. I don't think you have to have a special talk. That's just me, but there's no reason Santa ever has to cease to exist in your home.

    1. Love this-- and yes that is what we talked about with Lucas a bit about the magic of Santa always being able to be real, even though Santa is not

  3. I don't have children, so I don't know the right answer to this one. I DO know that I was the kid who clung to the belief as long as I possibly could - I believe I was 12 years old, and kids at school were teasing me about "still believing", so my mom finally sat me down to have the chat. I think I knew deep down, I just didn't want the magic to disappear. Christmas has always been my favourite time of year, and part of that special magic, for me, is believing. The day we had that chat was a very sad day for me. Now, as an adult, I always tell my friends to let their kids believe as long as they possibly can, because it truly is so much more fun when you do! That's sweet that your oldest knows enough to play along and keep the magic alive for his little brother - he's a good kid to do that for him :)

    1. Yes, I was more than happy to let them believe as long as possible.